Welcome to the official TON fc website. ------- Home of the best pro clubs team on fifa. ------- And the biggest and best website on the interweb.

TON NEWS


Each week we will try keep you up to date with the TONs latest events. 
Including any games played cup wins or new signings.

  
FIFA 21
 
 
Nov - Jul
Month 102 - 110
Well what a shit year new cunts join dont invite people on to play and thats all she wrote folks we didnt make the 10 year celebration cut short farewell good bye good night.

Oct
Month 101
Boom here we fucking go lads hawayyyyy the lads first game boom goal they leave next game boom Henrick hatrick lol. And heres the assist of the fucking year. 
 



 
Fifa 20
 
Sept
Month 100
Covid come back later. Well its another year another fifa more goals and more games more moans with shit cheats needing filters to help them score goals but we have now hit month 100 :)
 
Aug
Month 99
 
July
Month 98 
 
June
Month 97 
Coughs.
 
May
Month 96
 
Apr
Month 95
 
Mar
Month 94
 
Feb 
Month 93 
 
Jan
Month 92
Coughs
 
Dec
Month 91
Hohoho ya fuck. 
 
Nov
Month 90
 
Oct
Month 89
Halloweenbitches and the only thing more horrific that Limos face is the lack of people playing  


On a fun note The TON is now on imdb haha updating details. larsson is now planning on streaming a few games to get some stats and proof to show fixed games with filters keep a japs eye out for that.
 
 
Fifa 19
Sept 
Month 88
And now the end is near and so i face the final curtain my friend il say it clear il state my case of which im certain iv played a game thats shit i travelled each and every wing and more much more than this i did it the Ton wayyyyyyyyy. Its come to and end thank god fifa 19 is done stats counted shit added and now onto the "new" fifa 20 and some more fake games im sure so here we goooooo


Aug
Month 87


July
Month 86
Still playing an shit

June
Month 85 
Boys are back in town yeh yeh so Jambo comes on and so does Larsson adn boom more goals more fixed games with shity filters and more fifa was played lol.

May
Month 84
May the force be with you and by force i mean get fucked cause we aint kicked a ball for ages lol.

April
Month 83
Rossildinio is back and playing jokes im kidding hes in jail for kiddie fiddling while dressed as a gimp in school playgrounds

March 
Month 82
Well we keep marching on get it ? huh huh get it fucks.

Feb
Month 81

Well a nice start to the month of Feb the boys Larsson and Unicorn took on two teams of 7 assholes who like a bunch of try hards had 3 to 4 defenders with almost all the team running back to cover and tackle and defend but like the scrubs they are they both lost with the first team fucking off after we went 3-0 up and the last team were such scrubs they not only had a team of 7 but this was a sad reroll team with there entire fucking team on playing and they fucking played there shit little hearts out but it mad no difference they got pumped rotten by larssons finesse shot lol mon eh Ton.

 Jan
Month 81
Well its 2019 and the boys are back with a bang Larsson with 5 goals in a game with the first games of the year then the boys add a new merc that seems maybe like hes on crack or hyper lol


but hes here to stay it looks like mean time Unicorn has picked up his 1st red card of the new year and so has the new merc Oliver fuck me who names there kid that these days I mean come on son but yeh Olly is the new guy and doing ok other than the fact he forgets to calm down this aint ultimate teams and hes not a 96 rated guy lol.

In other news this week/month Larsson the living legend the demi god lol has hit his official 6000 games for the ton his 6015 league game including cup games its... (uses googles calculator) 7300 games total including 67 cup wins and 77 titles for the TON and a partridge in a pear tree lol well done Larsson as its the new year we are requesting from the Queen a knighthood for Larsson Sir Henrik Larsson sounds good.
Dec
Month 80
Well its nearly fucking xmas time again thats 8 years of tinsel and trees for the boys and still the same filters lol keeping us down holding us back like last night Larsson and Unicorn just running over team creating space and chances and getting hacked cheated and keepers pulling out saves of the century while on the same pitch out randys do fuck all let every one out run them dont go for tackles and make fuck all saves and give the shit teams chance after chance as the create zero for themselves its pathetic to see teams get hand me down goals given cause they cant play for shit but hey ho ho ho its nearly time to sit on santas lap and see whats in his sack.


Nov 
Month 79
Guess whos back back again yeh were back hide your kids wooop the boys are back well Larsson and Unicorn and the fattest starving man Fry powering through division 8 7 and into 6 and boom stuck in the mud cant advance any further with every fucking team always outnumbering us as since the days of xbox one none of the fucking filters work so its 2 vs 5 or 3 vs 7 in fact Larsson and Unicorn went through 10 months on fifa 15 with the filters putting them into games they could never fucking win but hey thats fifa never make it even or fair and let the best teams win keep them filters in and watch poor teams with no chance of getting a win or goal get wins and goals all because you simply are better than them ? any ways happy thansks giving you American cunts.




Oct 
Month 78
We are fucking back like a bad Ghostbusters remake we are back with all woman.. you know Limo and Fry with young Unicorn in the lead as the team manager this time giving his promise to come back and actually fucking play instead of not. With him is some other new person human Tristan sumin Lewis i donno some gay name yeh i said it. 

So the boys are back in town for some footy will they be back in full swing ? fuck knows time will tell im not holding out much luck for 1000 games this fifa but we shall see in other news that silver hair bent fuck Sneaky is still a no show did he glue himself to Ikea furniture probably. Now the Tons legal team Jay Me Fri have asked us to remove the above statements... and bellow and well most of the other pages as well leaving only that Limo is shite but we wont any lgbtqia that are upset to go literally fuck themselves with imaginary cocks.

FIFA 18

Jan - Sept
Month 77
Well last post folks its been a lonnnnnnng year of nothingness just no games no asks for games nothing people have moved on given up and the team was kicked entirely from the fifa 18 pro clubs section for not playing often enough. It was started back in Sept of 2011 with the late great Rossildinio... i say late great i assume he was killed by bears or some shit as hes not been seen in many a year but the started a pro clubs team for fun invited friends groomed kids online and brought in Uni and a few other twats and after just a couple of weeks the club was up and running with twitter and a blog and making its way up the rankings into the top 1% of pro clubs in the entire world even when out numbered even when filters kicked in and slowed them down and stopped them scoring even with Limo fucking it up and chipping it they played on the won and kicked ass the won trophies year after year and now it comes to an end with Rambo now in Austria and Rossildinio presumed dead and Limo an merc who cant afford xbox live for more than a weekend and Sneaky off making Ikea furniture for old ladies and Unicorn moving so far from home no internet could find him the team was no longer a team and has come down to just three men Joe Larsson and Ian.... and im pretty sure its all the same guy but with just one xbox live account he cant play solo so this is our last post and last update the Ton is now officially closed for good its doors sealed and players gone but at least we never got metood so its a big good bye from all the squad after 6 years and 1 month of playing the Ton is no more take care folks and always remember 2 things Limo is a cunt and The Ruffians are shite.


Dec
Month 68
Jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way oh what fun it is to ride Sneakys mums arse. Ho ho ho kids
Santa is not real its Jimmy who comes down the chimney and by chimney i mean your throat lol any ways xmas time again the ton march on with well almost no help no regulars and no fucking chance of a win with fake filters still just fucking up every game we play in our randys (npcs) win maybe 15% of all headers coming to them they walk in defense and always let the players go past and gain distance mean time our strikers have the opposite teams randys give chase and always catch up and out muscle all our guys the teams are clearly not even balanced and playing to the same standards its almost always trying to fuck us out of a win. Any ways rants over stockings up shit wrapped and ready for santa to show up.


Nov
Month 67
Well finally cunts have laced the boots up and Larsson and Jambo step out into the lights and its a cup game for the weekend and kick off has Larsson with a hatrick and a nice cup win with a 4 in a row win streak and the boys even got joined by that fat kid Jamie Fry god bless him. So the win streak went on to a 5 streak with 4 cup wins and a league game win followed by a shit loss. Mon eh TON.



Oct
Month 66
Em so yeh Limo is a spaz with xbox live that lasts for 3 days at a time and cant seem to buy one ever Ash is suspected to be dead or kidnapped by the guy from Taken no one really cares if hes getting bum rapped but be nice have an extra player on as Jamie Brown Actor seems always want three players on at all time or he has his period. As for the players of old none are back of course Rambo Rossildinio are all of being grown ups while Larsson is left on his own with tards to deal with lol so of course not a ball was kicked this month jog on cuntos.








FIFA 17




Sept
Month 65
Well its that time of the year no not Limos period its time for Fifa 17 to go fuck itself lol its over all the games are done and now its time to end the month with no games played. Bye bye Fifa 17



Stats in this week and well Unicorn fucks off from the team once again to play with Limo pun intended and it leaves just Sneaky and Larsson with stats for the full year


Well played lads well played.



Aug
Month 4
Yeh so football is cancelled lol not a single cunt has been online. Sneaky has been kidnapped by gay fake taxi Limos a cunt Unicorn only plays when hes got a 4 man team on and now hes off to Alaska and has no internet for 6 months so fuck knows when hes back on here




july
Month 63
Its all boxing boxing boxing fucking Mayweather Mcgregor in Aug and this cunt cant wait to stay up late and yoink a free view on twitter as some cunt slaps it online lol




June 
Month 62
Whats a fifa ??


May
Month 61
Em yeh so no one cares ??? busy busy busy


Apl
Month 60
Moving house and with no Larsson and Sneaky out doing Fake Taxi poor Unicorn has no one to play with lol.



Mar
Month 59
Well its been 5 years of the TON blog an site so time for some updates lol stay tuned cuntos.


Feb
Month 58
Well the boys are back in town. And Larsson steps onto the pitch for the first game of 2017 and the goals are flying in. We even seen the return of Limo but his old curse must have been lifted some how cause we didnt get fucking relegated this time yehhh. Mean while on the pitch players coughs (Ash) still bitch about stats "yeh fake stats" you see it was about this yime last year he complaind that he passed the ball each game WAYYYYY more than Larsson but Larsson unsure went and did the maths and checked nope he didnt infact he hit some thing silly like .2 less passes per game its not much pretty even but Ash not happy with as he confuses fact and maths with his skewed point of view is that he never gets the ball much (even when he does more than Larsson) and that he thinks hes hitting 4 or 5 more passes per game than Larsson when the entire stat sheet on fifa shows he doesnt but again Gayboy i mean Ash thinks that cause a stat says a higher percentage of passing this means you some how pass way more no its simple heres a little example to help you out...

If Billy Big Baws hits 20 passes but only 10 of them reach the other player he hits a 50% pass ratio.
But if Ashley No Hair hits 3 passes and only 2 of them reach the other player he hits a 66% pass ratio.

The higher pass ration only means more passes landed not more passes and seen as plenty of times poor Jamie Brown Actor runs the wing and puts in perfect crosses right into the box right infront of the defenders total sitters golden chances put on a big silver spoon but ash doesn jump for the ball and doesnt header it then the ball goes past and the other defender picks it up and it counts a missed pass for Jamie but he still hit the fucking pass and this seems to be the problem with the missing link they call Ash he doesnt get this at all it seems. Nor does Jamie seem to get that Ash gets handed on a plate over 5 shots at goal per game while he takes just 5 shots to score a goal but poor old Larsson gets just 2 shots at goal per game but takes 4.8 to score a goal so how is the more accurate striker and player Larsson ment to score as many goals or more than Ash when he gets less than half the shots and chances per game ? its not possible.




Jan
Month 57
 Well its new year and not a ball kicked maybe Feb lol.


Dec 
Month 56
A few games and a few nights out waiting on Sneaky to come home from ikea as hes got some new job were he puts all the screws bolts and plugs into the packets for people to assemble furniture so if you open up a pack and find you have 15 extra things and short 3 screws blame him. Merry crimbo you cunts now get lost 2016 is all over.
 


Nov
Month 55
Well the boys are almost back to normal after a shite start to the year Larsson is getting back on form catching up with Sneaky on shooting accuracy and the boys have now grabbed a promotion into division 3 after bagging a title in division 4. In total now the boys have bagged 7 titles as well as winning a cup run grabbing an Ea Shield. So far the boys have managed to bag 216 goals in just 128 games. Stay tuned and find out if the boys manage a promtion to division 1 any time soon.

And its stats time folks. 


After a shit start Larsson has gained back his poor shooting accuracy bring him back level with Sneaky. Mean while Sneaky alreay has been handed an extra 500 more shots than Larsson giving him a nice 102 goals. The squads passing seems to be up per game so far and this is probably helping with more team goals overal and promotions but with Sneaky now just taking all the penalties and Unicorn really only wanting to cross to Sneaky they both seem to be turning into Rossildinio. But regardless of stats and basic maths the boys still struggle to grasp what they mean and what they show. With both strikers hitting the exact same shooting accuracy means they both score goals with the same amount of shots but still the lads will argue otherwise not forgetting that with every penalty that Sneaky takes from other plaers boosts his stats higher with just a simple 16 goals from penalties would give Sneaky 10% more goals and 10% moe shooting accuracy so take that away from his 21% accuracy he would hit 18.9% shooting accuracy and much like Moneyball the movie the TON has a limited window of chances and shots at goal per game and the stats show of course only the players not the Npcs but the boys only get 9.7 shots per game and with over half going to just one player its not that hard to rack more goals.

And now the boys have even managed a promotion to Div2 a place the Ruffians have never fucking seen haha shit cunts. Mon eh TON.

Well that cheap bastard Unicorn has no internet so Sneay and Larsson have played on without him and even jumped on for a friday cup run winning an Ea cup and Continental cup with a nice 8 game win streak. Some sad bastards did message us when we beat them for a place in our second final calling us lucky for winning 2-0 fuck you bums.

The double cup winners do what the fuck we want.



Oct
Month 54
What a shit game this is lol i mean come on no fancy passes or back heels no real finese shot the lads played 10% of the games they played last year and already have higher ratings and now an update has made it worse and set the boys back a few levels. But even with all this fake no one can stop the might of the TON as we smash through the divisons heading for division 4 we leave behind the shity teams like the Ruffians haha shit cunts havnt seen division 5 in years they are stuck in the mud at division 6 if they are lucky and a few teams leave mid game haha any ways im rambling. The boys are back at it and Sneaky seems to be playing a blinder while poor Larsson is struggling to get his guy to just hit the target never mind score a goal but with that said the boys are still winning and marching on.


Sept 
Month 53
With a shit rocky start the boys are back. After someone tried to make a fake ton and recruit the lads to play for Australia ? i dono maybe it was some kinda internet scam and the boys thought they could get some gold by giving out their credit cards who know but the real slim shady is here and the boys are back in town.

And this week and year marks the 5th year manaversary of the TON as its now 5 full years since its launch on xbox and since the boys all started playing together.








Fifa 16

Aug 
Month 52
The final month of the fifa year before the latest edition of fifa comes out to dissapoint us all and the lads finished in style they marched on and powered through division three and two and took a nice promotion to division one and there they stayed for the final four seasons of fifa. The boys bagged an impressive 948 goals over 65 season on fifa before calling it a day 


Some up to date stats on the boys

 In other news those shit cunts The Ruffians finally blocked us on twitter after slagging them of that they never got past division five ahhahaaa you shit cunts in the words of a really small scotsman "GET IT SMELT".



July
Month 51
Well it started with a slow month after yet another TON member knocked up some girl but after some maternity leave the squad got back together and bashed on through the fake :) even grabbing some promotions and league titles as well.



June
Month 50
Some twats on holiday and probably locked up in some jail cell like a pow.

Well hes back from jail and and the squad mounted up and played a few shitty games and then pow the hit a home run. A 9-4 game a TON record with the all time highest scoring game ever. First half we have Sneaky getting 3 goals from corners an Uni getting 3 assists. Then on half time poor Sneaky gets kicked with his Lidels internet and the boys march on and put away another 6 goals with Larsson getting a goal after he called for the ball on the edge of the box from sneaky (he would never have passed that ball lol) then Unicorn smashes in a long range hero shot followed by Larsson calling for the ball again on the edge from sneaky to score again with a little help from a deflection then Larsson play sneaky in on the ball and he take a run and smashes it past the keeper for a 7 goal lead. Now only 9 minutes left in the game the boys have enough time left to equal the record 8 goal win already standing.... but no Larsson turns into the box from the wing and drills the ball along the deck and randy puts the ball away for 8 goals. The finishing fuck you goal was a picked up at the half way line were Unicorn carried the ball a  few yards sent Larsson through who was on the edge of having a stroke and Larsson cuts it back to sneaky to smash it home and take the all time record of 9 goals in a game.

Well done lads 9-4 win


May
Month 49


Were on a break.




April
Month 48
Well it was a slow start to the month but the boys plugged away and finally got into a situation were they could win a promotion from Div 2 and after a nice 4-0 win shown below they had another great game and smashed it 6-2 before the cunts left in the 85th min and of course the shit game that Fifa is it tried to cheat the boys out of the win and game and promotion but with xbox saving goals and me taking a screen shot to brag we have the proof.


So the TONs real stats for Div 2 are 7-2-2 with 23 points giving promotion and the title. But of course with the shit game not counting the win we lack the title in game but it was won with 21 points being the points needed for the win.


Sneaky Nuts with the last goal putting the TON 6-2 and making the shit team (JTC) rage quit.
March
Month 47
So it was another slow ass month when poor Joe was not able to play as assholes reported him for giving abuse down the mic. funny seen as hes not had the mic plugged in ever in any game.


Feb 
Month 46
Well this month was a slow one as the boys played all but zero games. peace out bitches.
Jan 
Month 45
Well its a new year and the lads are taking it easy with just a few games being played but they did manage a new word record for the lads and scored a massive 7 goals in one game and a total of 15 goals in just 4 games. Mon eh TON.



 Dec
Month 44
Well i wish it could be christmas every dayyyyyyy. Well its xmas time again an the boys have been playing well so well they supassed last years highest div and fired right into div2 even odd numbered 2 to 1 or more in some cases the boys have trashed all the other teams and are even in a position to now play and get to div 1. Tune in next week to find out if they make it lol.


Nov
Month 43
No fucks given November. A few games here and there played but with the drop of Black ops 3 and the hope of zombies the boys mostly ditch the ball in favor of guns and ammo.

Breaking news Rambo is back... sort of hes got himself an xboxone and got back online still not played a fucking game buts hes back.


Oct
Month 42
So new fifa and the boys are back. And it was a shit start to the year with having to wait a full week before kick off due to Unicorn now being a recovering alcoholic and spent all his cash on WKDs but once he was back we got a few games and of course the legend scores first Larsson with a nice corner kick from Uni. In other news Sneaky got the first card of the new season.


With Oct well under way Larsson and Sneaky have ranked up another promotion without my little pony and went past Div 5 andinto Div4. Ands during the Div 4 season Larsson was on to play his 5000th league game for the squad. And during this season Larsson managed to play a perfect game rating a 9.7 and scoring a goal while hitting 100% shooting 100% passing and 100% tackles.


The squad would later unite with Uni to push on an go into Div3 and put themselves 3 Divisions clear of those shit cunts The Ruffians. Haha those poor shit cunts.


And just like Larsson and Sneaky have jumped on late sunday and smashed some poor bastards 6-1 for a new record win for fifa16. A hatrick each for both strikers.





Fifa15
 
Sep 
Month 41
Well fifa 15 is now coming to an end and the boys went out in style winning 7 games in a row to win an Ea cup... it should have been 4 yes but the filter on the games as gay as Sneakys jumpers. And now with just a few days left before the next fifa the boys are gonna kick back and relax.
Also this week with fifa15 coming to an end the players stats have been updated to show 4 years worth of stats. TON ultimate stats. Again only players who have completed 100 games per year have stats done for them.



And the results are... 
Most appearances Larsson.
Most accurate goal scorer Larsson.
Most passes per game Rossildinio (the less said about passes to who the better)
Most assists per game Rossildinio.
Most tackles per game goes to Limo.

Least accurate scoring player award goes to Unicorn (for shame)

And life time achievement award for the top player goes to (drum roll)
Henrik Larsson
Well done Larsson a gift voucher for Woolworths is on its way to you.







Aug
Month 40
And the boys are back in town. Yes Sneaky has returned like that std you just cant shake hes back only now hes a almost does a trick pony. In other news Larsson is still awesome :) and the TON managed to grab its biggest victory so far with a crushing 7-2 win before the other team lost the will to live and left the game 70mins in.


July 
Month 39
A ball was kicked and goals was scored. that is all.


June
Month 38
Elder scrolls. nuff said.


May
Month 37
Well despite the shite fixed games by fifa the TON marches on and has even been in and out of Div3 twice now. Its still only ever Larsson and Uni playing with the odd guest appearance from Limo once every six months or so. But Larsson did even stream a few games just the other day on twitch. View them here if they stream any games in future




APR
Month 36
Well its been a fun week or two for the lads. Floating between div 5 an 4 then getting non stop fuckery with terrible games and terrible defending while on the other end of the pitch the players play well outside of the range they should. 

Old Larsson has even done some research on this and found that the cpu players and defenders play at a lower level on games that should be a lose and play at around beginner level and dont fully chase the ball or try knock players off it and the keeper makes little to no effort on saves while the same cpu defenders on the other side of the pitch play to professional level and chase every ball and cut out passes and saves and the keeper is able to make great saves. 

Adding to the mix the sudden drop in player ability coming by way of heavy touches missing shots you never miss having no pace and not able to outrun any one while on the ball while on the other side of the pitch player just run at a slight angle towards the corner flag and not a single cpu player goes to them or make any effort to go for the ball allowing them to just walk into the box with no troubles and take shots. Fuckery is afoot.




Mar
Month 35
Well the TON seem to be back in good form this week. While Ea fucked the game up for the day with a gay update that took back all pro boosts and levels taking poor Jambo back 9 levels the boys marched on and bashed everyone else struggling to play with a poor player. Seems with out huge power and unlimited speed and stamina no one wants to play haha so the boys racked up the wins and are now 1 point away from a promotion to div3 and just 2 wins away from taking the title and with 3 games in hand it looks likely to happen.




FEB
Month 34
Well look who showed up. Yup its The Bad Uni hes finally come back home to roost lil fucker lol.


And with a full "team" we are now back playing some football and pushing back up the divisions with a struggle of course as the games still rigged for wins and losses add to the mix a shit lack of filter means you get stuck with 3-8 players on any game you come into well done fifa well done games only been out years you still aint figured out how to make it work online and get a fair and even game. Cunts.




JAN
Month 33
Well almost nothing happened this month other than its a new year and new season and yet still no team to play with.




DEC 
Month 32
As of December the TON will be posting monthly... mostly due to the fact we have no players and fuck all to report each week as not a game has been played in forever.



Nov
Month 31
I think we need more than just Larsson to play a team game ? as the rest of the players are still mia football has been cancelled lol.





So not a ball kicked this week due to 2 things. 1. only Larsson is left in the team ? 2. Someone at uni learning some much ado about nout ?. Why is Larsson the only one left cause the merc that is Limo left again and Uni has went of to try his hand at some win a fiver master league on some bullshit team will he return ? hopefully.




A few games mid week and we even had the return of the famous chip it merc Limo that is all.




And not a ball was kicked this week as someone forgot to take an xbox with them.




Oct
Month 30

A few more games played this week and guess whos back again yup that merc cunt Limo. Hes back and with him his terrible luck lol. No promotion from div7 to div6 and then when he comes back on for a second time no title from div6 lol. And this week we found out why hes such a cunt at times and seems to just randomly stop playing or stop paying attention and drift off he hates people talking. "I jus get so bored listening to you all makes me drift off" haha fucking hell all these years wondering why hes running with the ball and then stopped has his batteries ran out ? no no just us talking as sent him into a fucking coma lol.


Possible Limo playing xbox simulation
Limo "mum there doing it again there talking"
Limos mum "Have you got your helmet on ?"





So it was a slow start to the week but some mid week games did get played keeping the boys in div7. And then some sneaky games on saturday managed to bag Larsson the 1st hatrick of fifa15 as well as the first free kick scored by the magical Unicorn and a last minute promotion to div6.


And heres one of Larssons hatrick goals
view it here
A FUCKING HEADER NUTMEG get in lol.




And not a baw was kicked





So that cunt Limo is back as the TONs new merc. And while we didnt get relegated we did struggle and just stay in div7. A cup run was attempted but it turns out xbox1 fucks up all the time with cup runs ? yeh makes fuck all sense to me but it seems at least from the merc that last year on fifa14 it was the same the entire year ? how can you fuck up a game 2 years running is beyond me but we shall march on.




Sep
Month 29

Well thats div 10 and 9 in the bag with titles to boot lol. And hers Larsson with a belter of a left foot volley.





Well its here muthafuckassssss. And its kinda shite lol. Yes the games pretty terrible load up pro clubs and start the first game only to find Larsson aint Larsson hes some other guy and the TON aint the TON they are Arsenal ? then the second game Larsson is finally Larsson BUT for some random reason the team gained two more players ? and one of them is playing as any hahaa and the third game was no better poor Larsson  is not some 5.10 swedish guy... or white hes a large black man with a huge ginger afro ? so not at all racist or stereotypical for being a scottish team lol


Uni "hahaaaaaa you look like a fucking jaffa cake like"






Well heres what team Unison look like this week. We aint kicked a baw in ages but we have been hard at work on destiny.






So its here the new xbox the xbox1 and with it destiny or as we say DESTONY. So of course we had to make ur own page and group and clan lol find us on facepuke here. And come join us on bungienet and join our group and clan here for more extra stuff.






Sept 
Month 28
Well who cares its barely 4am on the 1st of sept but am calling it national Jennifer Lawrence day due to the leaked photos just hitting the interweb. View em here >>> http://iamjoehalenbeck.blogspot.co.uk/p/aye.html

Also this week the boys.... Larsson and Uni played the last few games of the year getting a few goals and a promotion to god knows where lol. But whats new this week is the final days of xbox360 as of next week most of the squad with be on xboxone and by most of i mean Larsson and Uni.... and possibly that old cunt Limo if he wants back in. And the boys will be playing the new destiny game of course and we have even made a new facepuke page for it DESTONY go check us out. And see you all next week on xboxone.






Fifa14

Aug
Month 27
No shows. Nout new then. Roll on the 9th sept and Destiny with team Unison.





Well a slow week again for the squad. And by squad i mean Larsson and Uni as no one else now plays it seems lol. Old Rossildinio was captured online on fut like a fud but he chose to ignore the TON and play gay fut.

Well after some time off boys Larsson and Uni made a come back and played a Friday night cup run and then only went and done the impossible and won another 2 cups in a row. With 29 goals scored the boys beasted their way to victory and grabbed another Continental cup and an Ea shield. Thats a record 4 cups in a row with 17 games won. Pair of fucking legends. 

But what wll happen to the TON now that Ross has fucked off from xboxlive and left them squad to fend for themselves ? well it looks like Sneaky is going to ps4 as well as Rambo whos already on it but dont worry youre furry cause Team Unison will be on xboxlive and playing for the TON come sept.



Team is now going on ebay to the highest bidder.


Jul
Month 26
Well no one seems to want to play anymore for the team. Rossildinio has not got himself an xbox live gold account ?. And Sneaky has broke all his joypads in some kinda of emo rage attack and Rambo is a no show due to the fact any time hes home his wife puts him in a gimp box and locks him up so no games will be played for the foreseeable future.



No games this week as  Larsson seems to be unable to play. He may or may not have took a bite out of some player we dont know yet but Fifa will release a statement soon im told.




And what a fucking week not a game kicked mid week but on a saturday afternoon cup run team unison have done the impossible. A double cup win yes thats fucking right in 3 years no one has ever won a cup then won a second directly after it its always been a loss. And not only did they win a double but won it with 9 game as one team cheated by leaving 3-0 down and the game froze for a second before loading back and didnt give the TON the win. But its in the bag now an extra Ea cup and Continental cup.


Cool guys dont look at explosions they win two cups and they walk away.






With a shit streak as long as my dick the TON have been relegated to fuck lol. Yup getting kicked outa div2 then div3 and back into div4. All starting on a losing streak against 3 players in ever game then followed by a very fucking short win streak of 1 games lol as every game seen Larsson and Uni go up against 5-7 players making for an impossible come back mid week.





Jun
Month 25


The TONS top 4 players stats 2011-2014. These stats are overall and total.











Well with the world cup well under way this reporter was bored and did a TON player stats total. This is total stats over fifa 12-13 and 14 so far. It shows of course Larsson with the most games played and sadly Rambo with the least amount of games.








World cup time...






If you find our team please return them to the cow shed in greenock.



May
Month 24

Here tele telegraph....






Not much happening this week a late cup run was attempted on friday afternoon but was meet with failure (due to a certain horse beast leaving the team without a super midfielder in the last few games) and the team then went of in a huff after losing the final to some shit team with not skill or talent getting handed a win lol.







Well its with big smiles i report that cunt Limo is gone from the team. Yes the traitor sold his copy of fifa months ago has not played since and we have just learned hes now playing for another team #Traitoron xboxone. Yes brag all you want the new team is in the top 300 cause we know how bad you play and can with 100% certainty say its not from anything you did lol. Goodbye you long haired shit cunt.










Well this week was like the return of the mac. No not him but rather Sneaky Nuts making a guest appearance for the TON. Well i should say special guest appearance as he is a bit special... in the way that rain man is special lol.





But any ways Larsson and Uni managed to drag him on for a cup run at the weekend. And what a run it was the boys won each game with one more goal than the last game lol yes thats.... 1-0 2-1 3-1 4-1. That marks the TONs 8th cup win in total now. But still no sign of that cunt Rossildinio hes not been seen since last year when its rumored he had his genitals removed.






Apr
Month 23






Uk aye the noo. Its been a slow week fur the boys and even wurse they got booted oot division wan and back ti division too. But dinny fear boys that wee lad Larsson has been fighting away with his we dug Uni and wun a few games and are on thur way back to the top.








Well a slow week but never the less Larsson and Uni have kept the TON in div1.






And on the weekend the boys even went on a cup run. Even with Larsson dying of man flu and having a temperature of easily well over 1.000.000 degrees the boys managed to bag a premier cup. Mon the boys.
















Well its Larsson and Uni back again and boom just like that they romp div2 and take a nice promotion back to div1. Thats of course is the TONs second trip up to div1 now. #FuckingLegends





Mar
Month 22

Nout to report people so many people are no shows. And heres why Limo the cunt gets a new xboxone he then says.....


So after saying he can join we keep playing games putting up messages for cup games and cup runs and even being sarcastic when Larsson and Uni win a cup run all by themselves. After a few weeks of no one returning messages saying the want to play  Limo sells his game ?? lol yeh cause that makes sense seen as you have no xboxlive or facebook or twitter to see us talking about playing and when we have just won games OH WAIT YOU DO YOU FUCKING DRIBBLING HAIRY CUNT.






Well its a slow week for the boys yet again and not surprising when the entire team has been down to just two members for the last few months.


Yes poor Larsson and Uni left all alone to do all the work play all the games and win all the titles and cups. And wouldnt you fucking know it they won yet another cup friday night muthafucqaasssss.














So its been a slow week but the boys are still in div1... just but they did manage a late night cup run on fri and bagged a cup


The penitent man shall win the cup the penitent man the penitent man the penitent man will pass lol. Yes this marks the first continental cup win for the lads and fifth cup win in total. The wins were 4-1 2-0 3-0 3-0 2-1 yes thats right we had to win 5 games to win it as a bunch of cheating Irish cunts left the third game in order to try cheat cause we had scored in under five mins.




Feb
Month 21


And after weeks of no shows from other players leaving Larsson and Uni to carry the team old Sneaky chops has just showed up last night to help out the boys.


The boys had played a tough few games but managed to kick start div2 with a few wins before Sneaky showed up. And once on the park he may have been a pain in the ass and called for almost every damn ball but in the box he was on fire and managed to bag a good few headers from corner and crosses. The boys not only romped div2 but took their first promotion to div1 and the div2 title as well. Some fans compared them to the three musketeers lol.

Limo Rossildinio and the three legends Larsson Sneaky and Uni.








This week at Hogwarts the team have EVANESCO
(thats fucked off to you and me)




 

BUT wait just like magic the boys have returned later in the week. Well when i say boys i mean of course only Larsson and Uni as the rest of them seem to be on some kind of holiday. But not to worry Larsson and Uni have dragged the TON from div3 to div2 with a title win as well. Mon the boys.

 

 

 

So a new week and the boys have manged to stay in what ever division they are in lol only just mind you. With a shit run of games of late and the fact that the filter does not match teams in the same division most of the TONs losses have come from div1 teams even when they are in the likes of div4. But hold on Larsson and Uni have went on a nice little run and managed to rack up ten wins from twelve games with only one lose and one draw and managed to snatch a promotion to div3. Now the boys are sat on a six game win streak can they make it to ten ? tune in next week to find out.

And where are the rest of them ? fuck knows after having unprotected sex Rossildinio has lost his penis and grew a vagina Sneaky is still on twitter bitching about a txt he got back in 2009 and Limo has spent the last few days turning on his brand new xboxone. An xboxone he paid for with BUM BUM BUMMM a student grant tut tut Limo tut tut. A job placement in McDonalds looks pretty good for this boys future.





Well the TON did make a last minute cup run this week but sadly they took home nothing. The cup run was with Larsson Uni and Limo. The rest of the squad have not been seen for some time.




In fact the last eye witness to see Rossildinio and Rambo was at some gay wrestling event. The two fairies in question can be seen in the top right corner while some fat girl takes a photo.




 


Jan
Month 20
Well we did play a few games this week once Uni stopped finger blasting his brand new girlfriend.


A mock picture of what his new hot stripper/dancer girlfriend may look like.






Its national pull a sickie week. We are closed.



So we played some football n shit.



Well its Limo and the part timers at it again. after a typical forced bunch of losses then draws the TON was set for a nice win streak and Larsson was looking forward to this but wouldnt you know it Limo has dragged that cunt Batman back into the team and played at 4am.



Yes four in the fucking morning this douchebag stays up to and plays with the random part timers using up the wins the TON were due. So no Larsson and Unicorn will be taking some holiday leave and wait for the part timers to play some of the losses and draws... but hes not holding his breath on the part timer sticking around and playing much.





Dec
Month 19
Well its been a slow week here at the TON but Larsson and Uni have been plugging away with a few games.

   


The team could have had a few more games and wins but Uni has been busy out and about finger blasting Jade in Passion. 






SORRY the TON would like to take back that last statement about Jambo finger blasting Jade. Jambo may or may not have carnal knowledge of Jade... most likely he does but a new super injunction from the young player has prohibited this reporter from saying that he has done things to her. And the picture of Jade has now been pixelated to protect her identity.




Well its 2014 and Larsson and Uni went on the first cup run of the year. And wouldnt you know it they fucking blagged a cup win lol. Yup a nice new Ea cup to fill the trophy cabinet with. And Uni even managed to get the first goal and hatrik of the year. The squad could have had a few more wins but Uni went and had some kinda of fire alert lol. So like a pussy he ran out the building screaming like a little girl when the alarm went off. Well he might have as all that could be heard was the alarm down the mic.



Its christmas time and its the TONs first promotion down to div2 and short lived it was. A typical shit streak from fifas cheating programing and the Randys couldnt hit a ball or do much of anything. And a few minutes later the TON are back in div3.

Well its that time of year again when the managers do some team stats. And the players have just been reevaluted and value adjusted in the squad page. Stats will be posted on our stats page of course. And in a shocking turn of events the stats show Limo is now i higher player value than Uni. And the two highest valued players are now Rossildinio and Larsson.





Well the TON are back and playing. And its promotion then relegation... and then promotion and some more relegation again lol. Why i hear you ask. Well thanks to the assholes who made the game ball control is now more realistic aka shite. Shooting is sporadic and has less control and aim and more power. Running speed has been drastically lowered when on the ball to stop people being fast ?. And players now turn as if they are carrying a fucking truck. and even skill moves have been altered taking away tapping the ball ahead of yourself and step overs to dummy the ball as well as changing the controls now as to not need to hold Lt down to perform the moves this of course due no doubt to fucktards who play the game and bitch they cant do skill moves so fifa have clearly dumbed down to there level. All in the game play is a let down and has easily gone back a few years on ability and design. Not to mention pro clubs has been fucked off with no ability to save goals to keep them and no loading screen to see how many players you go up againts and this is just stupid no one wants to play 2 vs 7 but now we have no option on it. Well done fifa you bunch of cunts.

In other news Limo is still a cunt. Yes hes at it again and has just cost the TON a cup victory. In a penalty shoot out Limo with 1/3 stamina left managed to sky his shot only seconds after the opposition player with zero stamina who had pulled up three times in the game and had a stroke in extra time managed to put his shoot away and score. Well done Limo you cunt.

BREAKING NEWS.
Out of nowhere Limo has jumped on with Larsson and not fucked it up lol. A sunday afternoon cup run from the boys has bagged the TON a continental cup. After chipping the ball like crazy the last few days and missing penalties my dead granny could have scored Limo has played we...we... w ell. That was like swallowing acid. Yes the boys bagged a cup and even managed to highest scoring game of fifa14 go on lads. A 6-2 victory over some douchebags.




Nov
Month 18

Youre watching TON News. with five time Emmy award winning anchor Ron Burgundy.




Good evening Greenock. Im Tits... I'm Ron Burgundy. Well its been a while since the team really got together and played and its been even longer since Larsson stepped foot onto the pitch. But tonight hes back. And just seconds onto the pitch and he scores with his second touch of the ball. In total he scored six goals in his first three games alone.



For the entire TON news team. Im Ron Burgundy. Go fuck yourself Greenock.

  

 

69 lol. But yeh still no games played as of yet. Some of the team are on maternity leave and some have no xboxlive and some have cables that just dont work and some have fucked off to Ps4. Now with christmas around the corner will this team ever kick a ball again who knows.


Closed due to cheap students and unprotected sex.





Closed due to flooding.




Oct
Month 17
Well hes finally here. Uni that is. And with him came a nice 0-4 defeat. Yup Uni has kicked off his fifa14 career playing like Limo lol. With the team in utter chaos due to not leveling up or not paying attention or part timers just not giving a fuck like always the team have struggled to stay in div6 now for weeks. Will they make div1 this year ? this reporter thinks fucking not.


Closed back soon.





And  its more good news for the squad as the power through the divisions. The took div9 with the title and then managed to sneak a promotion in div8 and have now just walked through div7 into div6. Of course the squads is still missing Unicorn. and Sneaky has only just joined and of course like a cunt refuses to play dropins and help level his pro up so of course his guy i slow and shit and his first two games are a loss for the squad.


In other news Larsson and Rossildinio have been spotted around San Andreas. Rosscos player looked like a cross between Craig David and Lennox Lewis.... so basically a cunt. And Larsson spotted with a hockey mask on.... not sure if its red or thats just splash back from a few victims ?.





And shocking news Larsson has left the club after a poor show of team spirit from boss Rossildinio. Rossildinio showed up preseason and hired part timers from fucking twitter so he could play before everyone else. Not even a single shout out to the squad on twitter asking if they had season passes and wanted a game. And they are the ones who play the most. Of the five regulars Ross himself had the least amount of games played and the worst record for shooting and win ratio. Yet he abandones the very squad who won the TON cup after cup and title after title without him on the pitch. All because he had no patients to wait on the team. And wanted to get a head start on leveling up. 

Larsson had this to say "bored of waiting for games due to smoke breaks and cant really be arsed with running into space and creating chances just to have the ball held up on one wing with naive game play. hes cost us way to many games with his greed and poor use of tactics".



This reporter thinks its only fair Rossco should have waited on the team as the team wait on Rossco for smoke breaks. A soldier once said "i hear you won some great victory today"  King "perhaps you didnt notice the beach belongs to me... i won a great victory here today"  soldier "perhaps the king was to far behind to see the soldiers won the battle". And so true he may be the manager but he is not the team. And i have used spell check and there is no Rossildinio in team. Just look TEAM <<<. Larsson pictured above sitting at a call center playing tetris while waiting for a job interview.



BREAKING NEWS... Larsson joins back into the TON. In a late turn of events Rossildinio met with Larsson behind steffanos and gave him a gumshie and begged him to come back. Afterwords he bought Larsson a pizza supper and chips. Was this a pay of to keep the young striker ? who cares hes back. And with that the team pulls back the terrible start to div10 on fifa14 and gets not only promotion but the div10 title.





Fifa13
Sept
Month 16
And its here mofos. Gtav has landed and the squad have all jumped ship and been playing since midnight on tuesday lol.


So heres a trailer for our squad and our new online gta crew.





"Day six hundred and eighty nine in the big TON ouse Rossildinio has been locked in the bathroom now for three weeks. Limo has been voted out and in a strange turn of events Cookie has been vote back into the ouse. The rest of the ouse mates Larsson and Uni are in the dinning room".



Ok so what i was saying is fifa13 is coming to an end and Rossildinio has not been seen in ages. Limo has no internet. The traitor Cookie has returned again. And Larsson and Uni have been doing all the work as always.





The squad did take on the worlds No1 team.... now when i say No1 i mean of course the players in the team basically stole the No1 team as one of the players was in the squad as a defender an made a manager an when the real players left the team including the manager cause they probably hacked or cheated in some way that player then invites his gay mates into the team and they all change their names to a clan to match the name of the team lol.... so back to what i was saying the TON got totally cheated out of any chance of winning when the ref gives away three penalties for nothing. But good news come friday and the boys went on a cup run and bagged two cups for the trophy room.



Its only the start of the week but wouldnt you know it Larssons first season back for almost three weeks and boom right back into div1. Of course he had the Unicorn to back him up in midfield while Limo was very confused and mumbling "your such an mmmmmm" not sure what hes been smoking but yeh the squad are now back in div1. Thats now the 15th time and start of our 22nd season.

The biggest news this week seems to be the wait of Gta-v. And of course Rossildinio is recruiting Here so if you wanna join our gang do so.

Also this the TONs stats have just been done for this years play view them here. And the value of each player will be marked up or down according to factors like... games played, shot accuracy, shots per game, red cards, vision, adaptability, depreciation, player rating, value in each position and sales. Of course some players wont be happy but then a gentle reminder that your shit never hurt anyone. View the players value here.


So another slow week and not a game played. Are the players on strike ? are they just lazy cunts ? who knows. But sunday afternoon and Larsson sends out a tweet like an sos and boom and Uni jumps on... and so does Limo. And play they did. The squad managed three cup finals but got cheated out of one and robbed out f the second. But dont worry the lads won the last cup run and took home yet another cup for the trophy room.



Aug
Month 15
Well Larsson has still not made a return and the TON seem to have come to a stand still. Still stuck in div2 and playing almost no games regularly. But this week did have a real world event. We seen Rossildinio play a charity match with the real TON.



Rossildino got of to a great start and was hitting some nice passes and kept his position. But then he was took off for a short period before returning only to get took off again due to injury. But in the second half it all slipped away from him and his side and they started to lose. He did managed to get a shot at goal but only hit the keeper. Match rating 6.0. Ross pictured on the right calling for the ball like always.






Still in div2 this week. No advance to go no collect $200. What i mean is no promotion to div1 ? could this be due to Larsson not on the pitch who knows. But the boys have played with a mix of old part timers and new part timers. This reporter was sent an anonymous email from someone regarding this...

"Subject: shit cunts.
       Most of the part timers are shit they never show up for games, never play there position, and have tunnel vision or almost no football ability, some of them had there very own club yet wanted to come back to play with us cause they couldnt get past div4 and they just want to use us to get a chance to play in a higher div, the reason they never got past div4 is cause they are not good enough to do so they are not div1 or div2 material because they never learn they don not adapt and evolve they only hold us back.    yours HL"

Could this be true ? could the friends of friends who get let into the team only be holding the squad back ? do they never learn are they that thick stay tuned to find out.



Well Larsson has been of the pitch for a week and the boys have been playing shite. They went from div1 all the way back to div3. Well done Axis and Limo i guess. But its not all bad Larsson has come back and team #Unisson got promoted and back into div2. Of course things were halted with the WING MONSTER that is Rossco. This reporter is starting to think his new job as took over him like some kind of invasion of the body snatchers and replaced Rossildinio with some kinda of cheap imitation Rossco. Will we ever get the real slim shady back ? who knows.




Well its a fresh week and a good week the boys (Larsson and Uni) are of to a flyer. They stayed in div1 and after a good start to their 20th season in div1. The boys played well and when Limo joined them he even managed not to chip the ball or fuck it up and they were set for a div1 title needing just six points from three games.




On comes Rossildinio and all the play upfront comes to a crashing stop and its all right wing play. Does the striker get the ball played to his feet no. Does the ball get played forward towards goal and the striker no. The ball goes down the right wing in almost every attack.





But the boys are still in div1 and starting their 21st season so they still have time to grab a div1 title.



Jul
Month 14
Well the boys are back in town well at least back in div1. Thanks to team #Unisson... and Rambo. The boys played well and got the TON back into the top spot. So lets recap thats our 14th time in div1 and our 18th season.





But the biggest news of the week Rossildinio got the boys into the local paper.. it may have had a little edit lol.








Hold it back out of div1 lol. Yes the boss came on with some mercs and boom div2 bound. But dont worry team #Unisson played on sunday afternoon and bang back into div1. Thats now our 15th time in div1 and the start of our 19th season.




Well its been a warm week and a tough week. The TON battled for more than a few seasons in div2 and managed to claw their way into div1. Thats now our 13th time in div1 and our 17th season. And what a short fucking time in div1 it was lol. Back in div2 in a matter of mins. Could it be the part timers not linking up well or just some of the regulars not passing ? who cares cause team #Unisson just went on a motherfucking cup run. And what a run it was over 20 goals in 8 games and another shiny Ea cup AND a Continental cup to fill the trophy cabinet. Well done boys

Well nout much has happened these last few days. But theyre has been a little friction this week due to one of the managers being drunk on the job. This reporter isnt one to name names BUT its Rossildinio. The little midget fuck has been showing up for games half canned and playing some atrocious football. Calling for the ball in all the wrong places and times. Calling for the ball forcing the cpu players to swap wings and killing the attack. Or just in general keeping the ball on the wing and not playing the strikers throw on goal but instead running the entire wing with the ball and then playing no cross or a poor cross into the box. He has literally cost the TON hundreds of chances at goal these last few weeks. And even cost the team a few losses with spamming of the offside trap. Will we see a forced retirement from the job in the coming months ?.




Well its back to div2 for the boys. But the cup window has opened and Rossildinio and Larsson have only gone and bagged another Ea shield for the squad. And come sunday night the squad gather back up for one last cup run. And what a run it was fifteen goals in four games. With only twentyfour shots took thats 75% shooting accuracy. with Larsson hitting 100% shooting accuracy and bagging the winning goal in the final. Thats 33 cups in the trophy cabinet now.
Jun
Month 13
Well what a start to the week. Some late night games and relegation again for the squad. But dont worry kids team #Unisson got it back on track with a promotion from div3 (insert scary face) to div2 then took the div2 title. Just cause we can and are now back in div1. That now our 10th time in div1 and the start of our 16th season as well.

Also this week have you ever had zero shots at goal and still scored ?. Well we know a man who has plenty of times. Only the video below shows how Larsson can go one better and shoot yet still not take a shot and score lol.


He shoots he scores lol.

Half time results show no shots and no shots on target yet one goal. End of the game show Larsson with zero shots and one goal.



Well it was a good start to the week cue Limo lol. The squad were set to move back into div1 winning 1-0 until Limo did his usual and ran back out of position and into the box and gave away a penalty.
EVEN though he was already on a yellow he still made the tackle on the player from behind....


Limo you fucktard.

Well later the same night Larsson Uni and Limo jump back on. And its of to a rough start of this season with to many draws the TON need a good few wins for promotion. And wouldnt you know it its down the the last game. A win takes promotion and a loss well DOH. Now the TON are sitting pretty with a 2-1 lead and what goes an happens ? yeh fucking Limo happens. He calls a for a stupid ball AGAIN and losses the ball and its back level. But never fear boys n girls team #Unisson is here and they boys secure a victory of 3-2. So its promotion and back into div1 for the 8th time now and our 14th season in div1 now begins.

Hold the fucking press. Just as soon as the TON get into div1 they get kicked back out. Thanks to Limo of course with some epic slide tackles inside the box giving away penalties and points. But its all good team #Unisson kicked ass again and the TON are back in div1. Thats now our 9th time and 15th season in div1.

And is thats not enough its also cup weekend. And the squad havea couple more premier cups and were on course for an Ea cup. but that was short lived when this happened... FUCKING ROBBED. Fifa you are a bunch of cunts.





But we do have a new follower on twitter just some hot blonde called Kristanna loken. You might remember her from teminator3 ? yeh the bad terminator the Tx. Well she follows us. Could it be cause we are awesome or maybe she finds Larsson just to sexy we will never know lol.




And its a "friendly" match week with the TON taking on Asda fm live. It was a total of six games played over the week. First three games and its Larsson and Uni vs Asda fm. the boys would take 2 draws and 1 win over the cheating Asda squad who had played an any in the 2 draws. Then its Uni and Limo vs Asda fm. And the boys managed a 2-0 win over them. Come friday night and Asda were open 24hours and wanted a late night game. So now it was Rossildinio Larsson and Uni vs the ever cheating Asda fm playing as any again.

 Final results
TON 1-1 Asda/Any
 TON 3-1  Asda       
TON /Any 1-1 Asda/Any
TON 2-0 Asda/Any
TON 1-1 Asda/Any
TON 3-3 Asda/Any

So if we take all games played with a cheating any as aggregate then thats a 19-8 win for the TON.

  Larsson ramming one home for the TON.

Larsson had this to say after the last match "well in ya cheating fucking cunts".

Word on the street is that Axis aka Cookie has made his own team Asda something or other. Will we see a grudge match against the TON ?. Stay tuned to find out.




Now this week seen the start of team #Unisson. Its a bit like brangelina.... You know brad and angelina ?. Well any way team unisson is made up of Unicorn and Larsson.  Now team unisson has been kicking ass all week and dragged the team back from div3 to div2. And on friday with the "help" of Limo they even won the team yet another continental cup. Then on sunday the team jumped back on to win yet another cup run. Making that the tons 27th cup win.







May
Month 12
Well its still early in the week but Larsson has already managed to steal two classic goals. Starting with Limo taking a free kick. He hit the ball perfect towards the top left corner BUT Larsson times it nice and steps up and headers it just a fraction taking the goal. Of course Limo was happy celebrating until he spotted it wasnt his goal then kicked of with WTF.

 

Great steal.

Second goal was a classic turn and smash shot from Sneaky. And of course Larsson cuts across his path and sends it towards the front post. Have a look for yourself.

Also this week Rossildinio made an appearance DRUNK and managed to single handedly got the squad kicked from div3 to div4. But dont cry TON fans Larsson and Uni jumped on fast and got the squad back up to div3 and even took the title. Oh my lawyers tell me i have to mention Limo did play as well. Did he play good or bad ? hmm lets just say if i had a penny for every time he chipped the ball i would be a fucking zillionaire.




This week the squad are of to a flyer. Starting with a jump from div 2 to div1 while also taking the title and having a game to spare. Thats now the 6th time the TON have been promoted to div1 and the start of the 11th season in div1. But no sooner have the TON got into div1 and they have been kicked back out to div2. Now of course Larsson and Uni were having none of this and soon got the squad back on track and back into div1. Making that the 7th time now in div1 and the start of the 12th season. And with some scrappy games the squad have stayed in div1 for a 13th season.

Breaking news. After Larsson and Uni play  well all week the squads part timers have all jumped on played total shite and when Larsson and Uni left the rest of the players played on after managerial advice to stop was given. The part timers then got the squad kicked from div1 to div2. But thats not all even with that they didnt stop and instead played some more terrible football and got the TON kicked from div2 to div3 and then called it a night.


In the morning Larsson fired them on the spot Mr burns style. Of course many players found this a little harsh. Larsson had this to say    "the part timers are not as good as our regulars and play only three or four games at a time maybe once a month they never rank up their pros and only jump on for a game as a way to kill time for an hour they and pay little to no attention. They care nothing about the team and dont play as a team they pick up any position and never play it but instead run up front to take shots at goal wanting to all be heroes. And they take no responsibility for any losses when they cause them. They should have thought of the team and stopped after two or three losses in div2 and given the team a chance of saving div2 but they dont care and played on leaving the rest of the squad to clean up the mess they leave behind. Also the squad wanted to be in div1 for a chance of a cup run the next day. So fuck them. Play for the team and think of the team or dont fucking play at all".



And its a slow start to the week yet again. And the TON may have started the week in division three but they soon work their way up the divisions and back in div2 faster than you can say "my hairless balls are itchy ross" yeh its a long story just ask Sneaky.

 Oh also this week some mid week stats for you. Starting with the strikers and Sneaky hitting a staggering 4400 shots at goal in just 515 games. But Larssons hitting 3300 shots at goal in over 1000 games. Then we have the midfielders and Uni hitting 5300 shots at goal in 700 games. And Limo hitting just over 2000 shots at goal. But who scores with the least amount of shots ?. Well Sneaky is hitting the target and bagging a goal every 10 shots. Larsson on the other hand is bagging a goal every 5 shots. But for shame poor Uni, Limo and even Rossildinio are scoring goals upwards of 14 shots or more. Tut tut lads need to hit the training ground and find the back of the net and not the back of the stadium.

Well this weeks been a slow week with Larsson not on for many games and the rest of the squad apparently without Larsson on the pitch no one wants to play ?. Are the squad just a bunch of hopeless dangleberries ?. Well they may well be but once on and with Larsson upfront the squad manage to bag yet another cup victory. Making that the 22nd cup win for the TON.



Apr
Month 11
Well its a slow week but never the less Larsson and Uni have been on winning some games dragging the TON back up the divisions. BUT this has been brought to a halt when some of the squad showed up drunk at the weekend and killed the run of play. Rossildinio shall remain nameless. The TON squad are now saying no to drink and play.


TON squad say yes to prohibition.




Well its a sad week yet again the TON have been put out of div1. Not for a lack of trying. But as always fifa fucks them right up and cheats them out of the top spot with randys (cpu players) giving the ball away and leaving endless space for strikers to run into or just not making any effort to tackle at all. Larsson pictured on the right having a stroke after they got relegated.


Also this week the TON have a new video out check it out right here. Yes when i say right here i mean click on the word HERE. Now in other news the TON did go on a cup run late friday night and managed to bag yet another win thats a total of 21cup wins now. With Larsson bagging his 20th. And what a win it was the TON vs the dubbz. With the TON up against 10 pros. Yes 10 of them. But the lads stuck it to them from the start and pumped them 3-2.

Also this week Larsson played his 1000 game for the TON... again. I say again as he did this on fifa12 so this is the second time hes hit 1000 games for the TON.




Well its the start of a new week and the TON are of to a flyer. With Larsson leading Uni, Limo and Axis the TON has made it back to div1. Thats the 5th time now Larsson has got the team into div1. And have even managed to stay in div1 even with Limo playing. Thats a total of 8 seasons now spent in div1.




Also this week Rossildinio knocked up his other half






 

Well its been a slow week for the TON with most of them hanging around on cod. But the TON did get a nice promotion back to div2. But one insider has told this reporter that "this may be short lived as Limo was playing like a hump and bringing the keeper out like a twat" stay tuned folks for more details. And after Larsson jumping on to help the squad out the TON stay in div2.



Also this week the squad started a cup run. And they even got a little encouragement by way of a retweet on twitter from a young local star Mhairi Calvey. Yes thats the little girl who played baby murron in Braveheart. And encourage them it did they won yet another Ea shield. 






Mar
Month10




We have cookie leave the club yet ironically return as the evil Stampedaxis. Also the TON still struggle to move back up to div2 and have been stuck in div3 for more than a few seasons now. However this reporter does not see a promotion any time soon as Limo returns this weekend.






It was a slow week for the TON. And once a few of the squad had finally made it on for a game the squad even managed to get a promotion back to div1. But it was short lived with a few games getting thrown away by the computer defenders. But Larsson and Unicorn were not going to stand for this for very long and single handedly went about kicking ass in div2 and getting the TON back on top and back into div1. This marks the 4th time they have been promoted to div1 now. With a total of six seasons spent in div1.

Also this week with the TON getting a few more points from promotions the squad now sit at 605 in the world. That puts them in the top 0.1% in the world. Or for the forrest gumps of the world. If the top 1% of pro club teams in the world got split into 8 divisions the TON would be in div1. Just think how well we could do if limo wasnt around lol.








After a nice promotion to div2 this week the TON assembled at the weekend and went on a cup run. In total the squad managed to bag five cup wins including the Premier cup one time. The Ea cup one time. And the Ea shield three times. mon the fucking TON.





Well this week seen the return on the boss Rossildinio. And with him came relegation. Im not saying its in any way connected lol. After sitting in div3 for five seasons they finally made the push back to div2 only to get relegated back to div4 with the worst run of luck ever.

Also this week the TON put together a fun xbox avatar team picture. 




Feb
Month 9
Limo played and wouldnt you know it we got relegated. But once he was gone the squad made it back into div3. Now the biggest upset of the week was Rossildinio going on strike. The boss has said he is refusing to play a game until next week. Some say hes on his period but this reported has found out that it is because some of the squad members didnt join a website on time ?.



Well it was a shaky start to the week for the TON with the squad getting relegated and Limo playing shite. But like the champitons they are the boys fought back. And with Larsson and Unicorn playing the TON went from div5 to div4 and then from div4 to div3 in record time. Whilst bagging a div4 title along the way and even having a few games to spare.



 

Its valentines. So here ya go.
So sexy.








The TON found out it had got a rather nice retweet on twitter from none other than greenock morton fc. And mortons top player archie campbell. Also a retweet from the very sexy wallis day. Mon the TON.










Jan
Month 8
The TON posted a poll to let the fans and staff vote on some of the players. 


Poll one should limo be fired ?. And the results are 55% yes. What will the boss do ?.
Poll two player of the month. And with 80% of the votes its Larsson.  


Also his week the TON went on a cup run three times. The 1st cup run was on friday with Rossildinio, Larsson and Sneaky playing. And play they did right out theyre fucking skins. Winning the cup in one go with straight victories. Saturday was Larsson, Sneaky and Rambo. And yet again the boys played great winning the cup in four straight victories. Sunday was a big squad with Rossildinio, Larsson, Sneaky, Unicorn and Rambo. And yet again the boys win in four straight games. Mon the TON.




Rossildinio and Larsson kicked of the week by getting promoted back to div4 and only just missed out on a title. Rossildinio and Larsson kept the good play going and were just a few games from promotion when the TON was lucky enough to have Unicorn, Sneaky and even Limo drop by for a game.“and about fuckin time“ said one swedish player. Now the TON sit just a few victories from div2.




Also this week Rossildinio and Larsson went on a late night cup run. The lads won 3-2. 3-0. 3-1 and 4-0 with the last team leaving shorty after the second half. After scoring the second goal for the TON Larsson said "just give me my fucking trophy now"







After some terrible luck the TON ended up in div5 again not helped by the fact the TON have been playing with a skeleton crew (not literally... well not sure what limo gets up to at night) as most of the squad have not returned after the new year leaving just Rossildinio and Larsson to play on. And play on they did after the TON had been left one game from relegation Rossilidinio and Larsson got stuck in and kept the TON in div5.


Now the new year is over the squad have started back and after a few warm up games the TON have got themselves sorted out. And with Larsson scoring the first game of the year its of to a flyer for the TON. Now with a few games under their belts Rossildinio and Larsson manage to take the TON from div4 to div3 with Larsson scoring the first hatrick of the year.

Also this week get a look at the TONs updated stats on our achievements page.




Dec
Month7
The TON slip to div4 with the squad not playing any regular games in the run up to christmas.






Of course this is now the TONs second christmas, but for some of the squad it will be there first. So to every one in the squad and from every one at the TON have a happy christmas. And lets hope they get there arses back in gear after christmas and get back to div1.... if Limo doesnt fuck it up.




With Larsson an Sneaky on cod it was left to the rest of the team to stay in div1 but of course this came crashing down when that useless cunt Limo came on and got them relegated from div1 to div2 and then from dvi2 to div3. Well played Limo you cunt. So far this fifa Limo has been the only player to not help the TON get a promotion but rather get them relegated from every division they get to.




Larsson and Sneaky continue the great play and take the TON back into div2. But Larsson and Sneaky kept pushing and managed to get enough points to try gain a promotion to div1. And with a little help from Unicorn they did it.

Also this week Larsson managed to get a goal from a corner kick. Of course Sneaky didnt see it that way and thought the goal was his lol.

Also this week the TONs ranking even after a short break is back at 416 out of 198.364. Or put it this way if all the teams in the top 1% of pro clubs in the world got put into 4 divisions the TON would be in division1.


Also this week that crappy team ruffians asked for a few games late at night. Of course the TON playing just three men hesitated and Larsson asked that the ruffians play fair without an ANY but of course no chance of them playing fair. So game on and its Rossildinio, Larsson and Sneaky vs seven of them lol. And the TON wins it 1-0. rematch the TON get beat by two lucky goals caused by the captains bad and constant use of the offside trap 1-2. Last game for the night and the TON stick it to the cheating cunts and win 4-1 with Rossildinio getting a hatrick.



After a short break the TON boys have started back up again. After sitting in div4 due to players playing pish Larsson and Sneaky came back on and won 6-1-1 and got the TON back into div3 and even bagged a gold title as well.



Nov
Month 6

 The TON lads took some time of playing fifa as black ops 2 has just come out.




And Halenbeck managed to find some retard lay on the ground not looking he then crawled up to him pulled out a shotgun and i think thats a headshot ?








Larsson went on strike after a few of the squad refused to play him through on goal instead choosing to blast shots from miles away and waste chances at goal. After Larsson left the squad of course they got relagated into div4.


Cue larssons return to fifa and when he teamed up with Rambo both of them not only got promoted with games to spare but also won the silver division title with a huge 7-1 victory. Now the TON are back in div3


Also this week Rossildinio is ranked in the top 97th in the world for midfielders with his pro. Local rumars are the queen is set to give him a knighthood.


Rossildinio played some shocking football today and seen as its halloween we made this vid to show just how frightening it was...


Also this week while playing in the forth division Rossildinio and Larsson managed to not only get a promotion back into the third division but win the title. Later on Larsson and Sneaky managed to get a promotion into the third division. Of course it was a hard fought battle to do so as Sneaky was playing totally shit he missed around thirty shots at goal all inside the box including easy header finishes open net tap ins and even an unmarked header from one yard out into an open goal. But Larsson stepped up and dragged Sneaky around the pitch finishing like a boss and using the the randys (cpu players) to help him as Sneaky just wasnt up to the job. And in the last game Larsson smashed home a brilliant shot from thirty five yards past the keeper to send the TON into division two.






And after a great promotion the lovely coleen nolan gave the TON a nice message on twitter saying well done.








The squad played great and pushed from division five all the way down to division three. of course it was a short visit with the computer defense fucking up every chance it could the squad ended up in division four. but like the troopers they are the TON lads marched on and have just fought there way back into the third division.

Also this week Larsson scored the goal of the month, while playing with the squad Larsson managed to turn back across goal and whip in a nice shot. Of course the keeper just gets a hand to it and deflects it a little before it falls over the line. Of course Sneaky did every thing he could to try steal the goal claiming he put it in...


Also this week Rossildinio, Larsson and Unicorn all managed to rack up over one hundred games for the TON. But Winchester has yet to play a game and looks set to be transferred to any team for as little as a packet of wotsits.

Also this week Sneaky shits himself and pissed all over the floor. After playing a game Sneaky nipped of pro clubs and went for a piss and all of a sudden a huge daddy long legs leaped from the toilet bowl flying into the air attacking him. Police are questioning the neighbours and say it wont be long before they have the daddy in custody... The toilet has still not been cleaned.

Also this week the TON move up the rankings with 160.478 pro club teams now on fifa13 the TON are now sitting in 421th place. Putting them in the top 0.2% of pro club teams in the world.



Oct
Month 5
Cookiee fucked of from the squad. But hes back now the traitor that he is and is on a warning.


Also this week the TON lads make a fun dance video...



The TON have been moving down the divisions and have now made it all the way to division three.

Also with the continental cup open the TON went on a cup run. Playing for the TON was Rossildinio, Larsson and Lg greenock. the lads would get a few easy wins in before hitting a brick wall in the semi finals. but after 120 minutes Larsson was able to play Lg greenock throw on goal and let him finish with a goal. onto the final and the lads would be up against five douchebags and again struggle to take the win they would play on through the 90 minutes and extra time before winning on penalties.

Also this week the TON managed to secure the transfer of an old squad member X cookiie l. the TON managed to bag the young player for a hand job that Rossildinio was only to happy to receive. Lets just hope the young player doesnt limoo it right up in the coming weeks.







The TON lads had a fun tweet from coleen nolan saying hi. As the TON had asked for a hello to wish them luck on the new fifa. 












The TON are back with fifa13. With fifa finally out the squad have all managed to get hold of a copy and the team have been back up and running and even doing well in the rankings placed at 753 in the world. Mon the TON.












Fifa12
Sep
Month 4

 This is the last week of fifa12. But dont cry as we will be back with fifa13 next friday. Now as for the last days of fifa12 well the TON had a cup run last night but that was fucked up by computer bullshit as always. Lets just hope the new game cuts out the inconsistency of the computer players and makes them play to the same level each game.

Also this week Larsson got his 1000th assist for the TON. With some help from Sneaky.




Like moses parting the red sea Larsson has cut apart teams over and over creating 1000 goals for the lads at the TON.






Also this week the TON boys got bored as fuck waiting for the postman cunt to show up with copies of fifa13. so the TON boys went on a cup run. And took home an 18th cup. Come on the boys.

On the cup run was Rossildinio, Larsson and Sneaky. The boys were down in most of the games but didnt give up and managed to scrape through to the final. Once in the final the boys were getting robbed as the defence refused to make a tackle. And going into the second half the boys were 0-2 down but like champitons they fought back to win with 3-2 with ross putting away the winning goal from a penalty.

Tune in next week to get the run down on the new fifa and how the TON are doing.



And the boys keep on winning. The TON have just won a 17th cup today. Playing for the TON was Larsson, Rambo and Limoo. One the boys had made it to the final on came Sneaky to help the TON take home its 17th cup.

Also this week Larsson tries for his 1000th assist. But Larsson has had a few technical difficulties with a damaged hand. But still with nine hundred and sixty seven assists already hes on target.



Larsson got his one 1000th goal for the TON.




It took a while to get Larsson there with all the greedy bastards on. But with a little help from Hitman and then Sneaky Larsson was sitting pretty at nine hundred and ninety seven goals. And after a few more hard games Larsson finally got to bang in his 1000th goal.





This will now be the bench mark for all strikers in the next fifa that play for the TON.


Also this week the TON made a cup run and won a 16th cup. Playing for the TON was rossildinio, larsson, unicorn and rambo. Unicorn put the TON 1-0 up before sending Larsson through on goal to make it 2-0. In the second half Larsson went through on goal before getting took down and of course Rossildinio was happy to yoink the penalty and put them 3-0 up. Shortly after that Larsson chipped the ball in for Unicorn to give them the winning goal and a 4-0 victory.

Now shortly after the cup victory Larsson and Unicorn played in and won the TONs biggest victory. A massive 10-0 win. Larsson and Unicorn got of to a great start and were 3-0 up in twenty minutes and by the end of the first half they were winning 5-0. And just seconds into the second half Larsson was through on goal taps the ball past the keeper and bang 6-0 up. Larsson an Unicorn then banged in a few more and at ninety minutes were sitting pretty 9-0 up. But when Larsson got into the box he got hacked down and won a penalty. Larsson then stepped up and banged in the final goal 10-0.






The TON hire back an old merc Le2 hitman. While playing with Larsson Hitmans record gets of to a flying start with fifteen games played and twenty three goals and eleven assists.

also this week Larsson sits at 958 goals and is gunning for his 1000th goal for the club. And Larsson hopes to get it before the end of fifa12.

Also this week the TON have done a mass clear out and kicked all the players who never show up for games.



Aug
Month 3

Halenbeck has fun on black ops and does his best unicorn imitation.





The TON have a new trailer.




Larsson, Unicorn, Sneaky and Rambo played a game. A hectic game with a hacking any. so mid way through the game Larsson sneaks in through the defence and tries to take a shot. but as he does he literally gets gang banged. But poor little Larsson doesnt give up even with a finger in his bum he gets up and taps the ball clear for the assist.


Also this week the TON squad went on yet another cup run and won a 15th cup. Playing for the TON was Rossildinio, Larsson, Unicorn, Limoo and Sneaky. The boys played well through the first game but in the second round sneaky gets sent off stopping Larsson from scoring and forcing the TON into extra time and penalties the TON of course win just. The third round the TON hit a brick wall with an unstoppable keeper until extra time when they finally put a goal on the score sheet. Then onto the final and the game was a stalemate and went to penalties yet again. Larsson, Unicorn and Sneaky all step up and put the ball away but Limoo of course chokes and now its all on Rossildinios tiny shoulders. If he scores the TON take the cup. But of course he shows of and misses and the penalties continue until they miss again and the TON take the cup.

Also this week the results of our polls are in. Poll one player of the month results are. But wait officials have reported some kind of fix with sixtyseven votes and yet only thirtyfive voters. But dont worry the TON took into account any chance of a rigged poll and set up a secondary poll on the TON site with the help of Unicorn. And the results are Larsson with 50% Unicorn with 33% of the votes. The results of the second poll about weather players should be aloud to play as any are also in. And it was a mixed poll more than a few voting they didnt care but more voters picked no than yes. So it would seem that players are sick of people playing as any. And cheating.



The TON went on a cup run. The cup run started with just Larsson and Limoo playing for the TON. Game one the TON vs tuna chunks. Larsson and Limoo stretched for most of the game but they push for the full ninety minutes and win 1-0 with Limoo scoring the winner. Game two the TON vs schwum nation. Larsson and Limoo run over them and out play them the entire game with Limoo getting a hat trick. End result 3-0 the TON. Game three the TON vs we hate celtic. Again Larsson and Limoo playing. And right from the game lobby Larsson was busting to score a goal. But this would be the hardest game of the cup run with the any being a hacking prick and taking down both Larsson and Limoo through out the entire game. But with the TON making more chances it was only a mater of time before they got a goal. And after one hundred and fifteen minutes larsson put one in the back of the net screaming "yesss get it smelt". But his smile was short lived when limoo gave away a penalty in the last few seconds of the game and now it was a draw and on to penalties. With both sets of players stamina now fully gone every penalty was impossible to take and every single penalty was put up in the air. But after eighteen penalties the TON won. Scoring only two. The final the TON vs inallywetrust. Yes ally as in ally mccoist. The second rangers loving team in a row and with that Larsson was more than happy to fuck them up. But this time Larsson and Limoo would be joined by Unicorn and Baby limo. Once on the pitch the TON find that inallywetrust have a pro keeper and an any. But the TON stuck it to them the entire game and after Larsson skins the defence he lines up a shot and bang hes took down giving the TON a penalty, Larsson steps up.....

Larsson penalty

"fuck you keeper", The TON now 14 times cup champitons.


Also this week Larsson hit his 2000th game for the TON. Larsson was joined by Limoo on his 2000th game and the lads managed to pick up a victory and a goal each. Limoo was also breaking records himself this week by picking up yet another red card putting him now on more red cards than Rossildinio, Larsson and Unicorn together.



Jul
Month 2
Assistant manager Halenbeck does a moneyball. Using the teams stats sheet he came up with this. He also worked out a gravity is false and every thing has a magnet inside.




Taking into account the ratio of tackles won by players and ability to hit the target. And of course the danger of some players in any box. And other players getting nose bleeds in the box trying to score Halenbeck came up with this team sheet.

Halenbecks conclusion... Score more goals. Win.






The TON are in search of a keeper to play for them. They have had one or two play for them but each of the so called "keepers" has ended up just wanting to play as striker or left and due to legal reasons. Im not permitted to say why due to the super injunction Larsson has. The TON did get one keeper that was pretty good but he clashed with some members of the team as he wasnt a mackum.




So if you play as a pro keeper .And no one else will take you. And if you can find us. Maybe you can play for the TON.






Also this week the TON gave Larsson a huge gift in the way of a bronze statue outside the cowshed to thank him for all his work with the TON.



The TON raised the money for the statue by selling horse seaman and would like to give a big shout out to Unicorn for donating. After seeing the statue Larsson had this to say "waw its a great honor to play for the ton and now tramps will always have some thing to piss on as they walk past".







The TON took on cheryl cole fc. And playing for the TON would be Rossildinio and Larsson. And they would be up against a team of four including a pro keeper. Cue the larsson rage face.


From the start Rossildinio and Larsson stuck it too them out playing them all over the pitch. And like a typical scouser it wasnt to long before she spread her legs and let Larsson slot one in. Now shaky she was at the full mercy of Rossildinio and Larsson who were only to happy to tear her up some more. And after a little foreplay they banged a few more into her before the team fucked off giving the TON a 5-0 win.

After the game Larsson said "yess strike that of my bucket list.. fucking cheryl in her little brown ashley cole".


We played we won jog on.




Jun
Month 1

 The rematch. The following week the ruffians wanted a rematch and a chance to win back some pride and finally beat the TON. The TON would have Rossildinio, larsson, limoo and The bad unicorn playing again. This time the ruffians would be playing with just four players and some one playing as any.





 Again the TON lads played great. With Larsson settin up a few. And Limoo and Unicorn running all over the pitch to win the ball back it was a well fought game. Of course the TON won yet again crushing the ruffians again.





End result another two victories and a draw. Proving the TON are champitons. If only the pricks at the Ruffians could play and stop cheating it might be a weekly or monthly thing sadly no one at the TON likes playing cheats that much so they can fuck right off in future.




Hi and welcome to the TON official news page. We will keep you up to date with any goings on during the weeks of play and whats been hapeening with the team and its players with a slight fun twist we aint the news of the fucking world. So lets start shall we..


This week the TON had its first friendly grudge match. The challenge match was against the ruffians fc. lead by Ruffian stew... a cunt who pretends to play fair and puts it all over his clubs blog but never actually likes to play fair instead prefers to cheat and play as an any





Playing for the TON was Rossildinio, Larsson, Limoo, The bad unicorn and a last minute new signing of stinking brisket. They would be up against a team of ten players including a pro keeper. Why 10 cause they are not good enough to take us on with an even amount :)




Larsson with a rage face when he spots that last min change from defender to keeper to try cheat that little bit extra and still one of the ruffians playing as any. From kick off the TON lads played out of their skin covering the entire pitch not only pushing forward but tracking back for the ball. The end result was the TON with a victory from a goal by Unicorn. resulting in the shity keeper getting kicked out of goal and someone else taking his place rather than let the game be an even cpu keeper.


They TON would play a total of four games sticking it to them the entire time. Resulting in two victories and two draws. and the draws came by way of rage quiting bitching the Ruffians leaving and going down to 4 men and playing as any again. Shit cunts. Each time they played as their pros only they lost even when out numbering us 2 to 1 and when they played as a cheating any they won... most of them not all... cause theyre shit.
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